It’s that time of the season

News has been less than inspiring lately IMHO, so here’s an open question to y’all: Are certain times of the year more difficult for you in terms of your eating disorder? For instance, do certain times of year bring back memories that are difficult to deal with? Does SAD let your eating disorder strenghten its grip in the advent of winter? Do the holidays stress you out and make it easier to skip meals? I ask because fall is upon us in the northern hemisphere, and for me, this is a dangerous time of year. My eating disorder loves it. The rest of me does not.

I have a few strikes against me when fall hits, such as;

• The colder weather. As soon as the temperature falls below 75 degrees, I am in a permanent state of chill. From November-March, you can find me coccooned in an electric blanket and/or wearing several layers of clothing at all times.
• As the temperature falls and the nights grow longer, my depression gradually becomes worse. Meds alleviate this to an extent, but not completely. Psychologically, part of my depression at this time of year is manifested in my dread of winter, and meds don’t change that. They do, however, help me deal with it.
• On that same front, when the leaves are gone and everything looks dead, I feel dead. I feel dormant, waiting until it’s time to come alive once again. I have a strong empathy with nature, I guess.
• October 4 is my purgiversary. Traditionally, uh, I have celebrated the occasion.
• The months of October-December have historically been my worst in terms of the severity of my eating disorder. My tendency toward ED behaviors makes a marked increase once the leaves fall. At this time of year in 2002 and 2003, I was out of control. But even last year, well into a so-called state of recovery, I struggled. Here we are once again, and I’m bracing for the impact.

What are the more difficult times of year for you? Discuss!